Saturday, September 12, 2020

Lucy’s Labor Day weekend

https://drive.google.com/uc?export=view&id=1JJkE44-xxutuKxS5rirSMG0j3D5oaE2nhttps://drive.google.com/uc?export=view&id=1qNFT1JaN-GwOp6eLpZScmHGE1lmlb23vhttps://drive.google.com/uc?export=view&id=1ppvrLvrGLYxej1Co776G8X6gFZ7OwHIFhttps://drive.google.com/uc?export=view&id=1UDJq4nxNaFgXPkE3-dojjEuNoJb_D0BShttps://drive.google.com/uc?export=view&id=1eaI4Jro8OaLPq_oFhLsX1NpfLE-DXkkfhttps://drive.google.com/uc?export=view&id=1qQK001A15vwTo5W83WKYDY2id5GOyTzUhttps://drive.google.com/uc?export=view&id=1AclgWKNKRQdXd14_IzziK8Dm_-0DDxDwhttps://drive.google.com/uc?export=view&id=1O7gtdXFRy3Y3bZqOjZrhNQaGTdv8G7Mjhttps://drive.google.com/uc?export=view&id=1iYJcVhZ-Dcd0khZ5PrFB6i5FVk9yA7Q6https://drive.google.com/uc?export=view&id=17e_OMNVdNhoiUcIDV5p6Fv-wkpYnUM_Z
https://drive.google.com/uc?export=view&id=1AVfsukiBcI3u7_ld3TTKhL1K5XBOIgTQhttps://drive.google.com/uc?export=view&id=1WV9c7wm30LYqqHkpsXXbFDns0xHY5XE8https://drive.google.com/uc?export=view&id=18eS6oG-TkT-GRRgaOa6__jFwP41VW0qYhttps://drive.google.com/uc?export=view&id=1V-SskPKDvyOSZK5fBiJl0uGZKUh_fsCDhttps://drive.google.com/uc?export=view&id=1-oSpN_yG6R7L6QNzCzBCAJQz4r1bNar6
Birth Journal


I’m not going to lie.  I was really hoping our little Lucy would come over Labor Day weekend.  I wouldn’t have to worry about class or other obligations for the boys, Dane would already be at home and it would be easier to find friends to watch the boys.


Well, my wish came true.  Friday night I took Max out for a walk, as I often do, and met some ladies.  One asked how far along I was.  She then said, “Well, I’ll tell you what my mom told me, ‘Eat a greasy burger.’”  Apparently it had worked both for her mom and for her.

I laughed and said, “We just might have to try that!”  The truth was, I was already planning on having burgers the next day.  And yes, we kept them nice and greasy.

I don’t know if it was the burgers but our little lady love came early the next morning.

I also worked out more than I had in 9 months on that Saturday, the 5th.  When I went into labor with Hinckley it was after a particularly hard workout so I had that at the back of my mind, too.

Whatever the reason, I started feeling some cramping while putting the boys down that evening.  It was not that bad and very irregular and when it stopped completely around 9:30, I figured it was false labor and tried not to get my hopes up.

Even so, I packed the last of my things and reviewed some pages in my hypnobirthing book, just in case.

I’m so glad I did.  

Before going to bed early (Dane was more nervous than I was and I think the worrying made him tired) Lucy got in a Really weird position.  So weird that I had Dane use a rebozo (a big scarf) to move her around.  It was so much more comfortable after that.


It didn’t feel like I fell asleep but maybe I did.  In any case, possibly around midnight, the surges started again but this time they were far more painful and longer.  I also needed to go to the bathroom a lot, which was familiar.


When I felt a substance that felt familiar from Atticus’s birth, I turned on the light and checked.  Sure enough, I could tell that my water had broken.  


I am so grateful I didn’t stay in the dark and started acting fast because, little did we know it, we were barely going to be able to have this baby with the midwife.


I woke up Dane and told him.  We packed up, timing surges and gaps just to be sure we weren’t going way too soon.


A wonderful family had told us to call them in the middle of the night and they sent two of their daughters over right away to spend the night with the boys.  That, alone, was a miracle.  With no family nearby and Covid limiting our options, we are so grateful for them and the other families who offered to watch our boys.


We raced to the hospital and I was quickly admitted.  I must admit, being asked to put on a mask (and being reprimanded, “Keep that mask up” during a very painful contraction) made me pretty angry.  Thankfully, as soon as I was taken to a roll the mask wasn’t necessary.

I was also really grateful because the hospital was way better at honoring my birth plan this time around.

From there, the delivery went really quickly.  It felt long- the surges felt much more painful than I remembered Hinckley’s being! 

There were several times I had to be on my back to be checked, connected to an IV, etc.  those times were excruciating.  The rest I felt barely able to cope with.  The only thing that got me through was Dane’s counter pressure on my back.


Dane was also inspired- he suggested putting the yoga ball on the bed where I had been on my hands and knees.  It really did seem to do the trick.


Things went so quickly that I was feeling the need to push and the midwife hadn’t even arrived.  They checked to see where she was and she was just getting off the freeway.  I did my best to breathe through the next few incredibly painful surges, fighting the need to push.


She then walked into the room.  It was a matter of seconds before my next surge started.  Little Lucy came out probably a minute or a minute and a half later at 3:42 AM.


The midwife slid Lucy up under my tummy and, for the first time, I was able to hold my baby and get skin to skin, right away with delayed cord clamping.  She was (and is!) just beautiful!  They even let Dane cut the cord after clamping it.  The feeling of holding her in that moment was indescribable. 


Then, after they got her warmed up I was given another glorious privilege- a “golden hour” to get skin to skin and nurse her.  This was also new for me.  Atticus went straight to the NICU and my birth plan was ignored in many ways when Hinckley was born.  Spending that time with her in the early morning was pure bliss.


We noticed some things right away.  She got her Daddy’s long eyelashes.  Her hair is really dark and thick- thicker and darker than the boys’ and maybe a half inch longer in the back. She has some hair on her ears that the boys didn’t have.  She has one dimple and her facial features really resemble the boys’ so far.


Her breathing can sound like someone breathing in and out of a harmonica at times and she’ll occasionally make this sounds that remind me of a clown horn.


After the birth we were cooped up in a room, isolated from the world due to Covid-19.  Not even our boys were allowed to come, which was really hard for our family.  Thankfully, the Barnums watched them on Sunday and Bobbie watched them on Monday so they are happy.   It was so hard to wait to have them meet her.  When I called them with a video message poor little disoriented Hinckley asked me, “Mom, are you killed?” and started to cry.  It broke my heart but I think the day was much better for him after that.


Their first meeting was magical.  We were released from the hospital around 5:30 in the morning and were able to get home by 6.  We woke the boys up with Lucy and they were so excited.

Hinckley asks to hold her at least three times a day.  He does love with bit of intensity that we know we’ll have to watch for but he’s just as in love as we expected.  

It’s Atticus who has surprised us with how much he loves her.  He loves how small she is and her little fingers.  He’ll often pause whatever he is up to and say he wants to see the baby.  He’s been a huge helper through everything.


I wish I could say the same of Hinckley.  He seems to have grown in every way while else we’re in the hospital (we really think he had a growth spurt because his head was bigger, his legs are longer and he’s gained a few pounds!) but behaviorally he’s been regressing.  His fits have been much stronger and more frequent.  We’re not surprised but it can be frustrating. 




Thursday, September 3, 2020

August Maternity Photos

Once upon a time our family walked into our church building for the first time in four months.  We sat down in a pew two rows ahead of our sweet back door neighbor.  The first thing she said to me was, "When are we taking maternity photos?"

I had had no intention of taking any photos (aside from the weekly shots I've been taking of my baby bump.)  It can be really challenging to feel beautiful when you're pregnant.  Yet I look at other women who are expecting and I see beauty.  I see majesty.  And this pregnancy is an absolute miracle for our family.  It hit me immediately- why wouldn't I document this time if given the chance?

I'm so glad we agreed and I'm so grateful for Kari Ann Larsen and her daughter Kaycee McAllister.  The two of them were like fairy godmothers who helped me feel beautiful for a day.

Photos by Baby Led Photography- https://babyledphotography.pic-time.com/client