March 2023

March had a beautiful beginning.  On March 7 Israel turned 2 weeks old and we went to my sweet and incredibly talented friend's home for a photo shoot.  The pictures are treasures:

If only things had stayed this way.  No, March definitely came in like a lamb and out like a Lion.  Sweet Baby Israel went from sleeping all the time to crying a whole lot by the end.  We still love him like crazy but balancing three kids, two of whom are homeschooling, plus a colicky newborn has been a real challenge.

Our sweet Israel never really did "sleep like a baby."  Even in the hospital I couldn't get him to sleep on his back and, although things got better for a week or so at home (I put him on his side or on his tummy) it got progressively worse.  By the end of March he was so gassy that I started just wearing him during the day for his naps and holding him in a recliner at night.

Here he is the day he turned 1 month old.

It was only a couple weeks later that his colic got so bad that he couldn't sleep, even when being held.  I've never had a baby cry so hard, even while being soothed.  For several days in a row he has been crying from roughly 8 PM-11 PM or later.  Even with our attempts to soothe him, which worked for all of our other kiddos.  I hate seeing him in pain but it's also just frustrating because we're so tired!  I actually put him in the car seat and took him for a drive one night at 11:30 or so to try to get him to sleep.  I'm happy to say that it worked that night, although it didn't work the following evening.

Thankfully, we think we may have it figured out, at least a little.  Last night, the last night of March, we were able to get him to bed by 10:30 after a much more peaceful night.  He still had bouts of colic but they were shorter and he was able to nap between them.  He also had his longest stretch of sleep, yet!  Five and a half hours is amazing for a child of his age and I woke up and prayed with tears of gratitude for such a blessing after a month and a half of sleep deprivation.  We'll see what April brings for our sleep saga.  For now, we are very, very grateful.

Lucy was so hard at the beginning of the month.  It's a little difficult to explain why she was just so difficult.  She just seemed stuck in her own world.  She would stay in her room for hours, pulling clothes, underwear and diapers out, then she'd sit with them all spread around her on the floor and stuff some in her backpack.  Any attempts to clean up would get her upset.  She would refuse to get dressed (Maybe she'd put a pair of Hinckley's Spider-man underwear on over her diaper, but that's it!), refuse for a couple of hours to come down to breakfast, refuse to go anywhere...  And being distracted with a newborn and the boys' needs made it difficult to make her do anything.  

Usually, by 9:30 or 10 she would come down for a late breakfast, but often she would stay in her pajamas until after her nap or she'd even be in just a diaper when she would take her clothes off.  We would try to dress her and she would be so indecisive that we'd give up and leave her crying.

Thank heaven, things have gotten much easier.  The only problem we have, at present, has been that she started getting scared at the end of the month.  She woke Dane up in the middle of the night (I was already up with the baby) saying she was a scared of spiders.  Since it happened more than once we decided, for better or worse, to let her sleep with the boys on the extra bed we have in there.  It's only been a couple of nights and they are all extra tired... but but she hasn't complained about being scared since.  We hope we made the right choice.  We are just too tired and stressed to have one more person to worry about in the middle of the night!

Listen to Lucy:

• "Mm-hm."  (Her only response- she never says, "Yes.")
• "Don't get mad, Mom."
• "I not make mess, Mom."
• "Lucy is pwincess, too!"
• "She's petty, she's petty... she's petty..." (Pointing at girls wearing dresses in books)
• "This is cute, this is cute... this is cute!" (Looking at her clothes, especially some recently received from cousins.)
• "I cahn't do this, Mom." (She still pronounces all a words with ah, as in pants- "pahnts.")
• "This not Hinckley's (or Atticus's).  This Lucy's." (Not yelled, said in a slow, deliberate way.)
• "I tired, Mom/I cold, Mom."
• "Good moning, Dad." (after her nap.)

Another source of frustration this month has been our Hinckley.  He can be such a peacemaker and source of joy but he can do just the opposite.  

Here he is at a soccer practice, refusing to play.  Before this he had been yelling at me every time things didn't go his way.  He'd say things like, "It's all your fault!" when he missed the goal or "I'm not doing another thing for you!" when he'd go back and rejoin the team after stomping off in a huff.  

This was the worst of the times he got mad and took it out on me.  After thinking it over I realized this was probably the result of very little sleep (his allergies were so bad at the beginning of the month, which I'll discuss more next.) and a sugar crash after a special lunch with Dad earlier that day.  There were several other occasions, however, when he lashed out at me.  He has mentioned to people that the baby is "hard" and that having his dad at home is "challenging."

On top of having a fussy baby, poor Hinckley's allergies acted up again this month, as I mentioned earlier.  He is pretty much stuffy all year round and we're all so sick of it.  It can make sleeping so difficult for him and he always breathes with his mouth, even when eating.  It causes a whole host of problems.  

SO we finally got a referral from the doctor to get his blood tested for allergies.  We were so excited at the prospect of finally getting some answers as to what specific allergies he has.  Unfortunately, things didn't go so well.  The phlebotomist botched taking Hinckley's blood and was pretty much digging through his arm trying to find a vein.  

Poor Hinckley, who had been SO brave initially completely refused to let the guy try his other arm and I didn't blame him.  When they asked if I wanted to have him held down I just couldn't do it.  The poor little boy was already in so much pain and was terrified.  So we were unable to get any blood drawn and we're still in the dark about what specific allergies he has.  It was very disappointing and, for Hinckley, very traumatic.  

Even with all of these negative experiences, we hae such sweet moments with our Hinckley,  His heart is so big and so tender.  On one occasion he walked in the house and with a sweet smile on his face asked me, "Mom, when is a time you felt the Holy Ghost?"  I shared an experience with him and he asked Atticus the same question.  With some help Atticus answered the question.  Then Hinckley shared, "I felt it outside now.  I just gave [his friend] back his bow staff and I felt warm inside and it spread through my body."  It was a beautiful conversation that I don't want to forget.

Hinckley Speaks:

• "I hate daylight savings!"  ("Do you know what it is?")  "No!  What is it?"
• ("Shoot, I'll read this to you in a minute.  I have to go to the bathroom.") "It's okay, Mom.  Just don't poop in my bathroom."
• "Israel used to smell so good.  Now he just smells like spit up.  Why?"
• "When are they going to heal me?" (Talking about his allergies, hoping an allergy test will help him.)
• "Israel is my baby friend."
• "I'm going to make Israel a lullaby playlist."

Atticus has had quite a month when it come to soccer.  His team began playing games at the end of the month and he started the season off by getting a hat trick (scoring three goals.)  We also have him training with another team right now (he was attending a camp and the coach of a club team invited him to train with his players), which he loves.  Getting him to practice three days a week with our colicky baby and other demands has been stressful (in addition to games on Saturdays) but we love seeing him improve and it certainly helps channel his seemingly endless energy. 

Something that should be written down has been the hard lessons Atticus and Hinckley have had to learn recently.  Last month, the two of them were playing upstairs and broke a small TV we have in the playroom.  It happened after repeated warnings from me that they were going to hit the TV so we were pretty frustrated with the boys.  At first we looked up the price of a Tv that size and Atticus grabbed his hard earned cash and gave us half of the amount.  After talking it over, mercy won us over and we decided that for their consequence the two of them wouldn't get their allowance until April. 

This month, we discovered that Atticus had broken a goal we had gotten for him in anger.  We decided he could make up for it by doing the dishes for two weeks.  

We hope we weren't pushovers, but we both agreed: we don't want his money, just for his behavior to change.  We'll see if it helps at all. 

For homeschool this month we studied Native Americans, American Expansion, Cowboys, Pioneers, and the Middle East.  We watched a bunch of Western movies, which was so fun.  They loved seeing Shane, watching The Lone Ranger (Hinckley once asked me how the show "lost its color") and we especially loved The Apple Dumpling Gang.

We read a book I used to read with my 7th grade students, The White Indian Boy.  I had forgotten how exciting it was and how much great information it has! 

We learned about Persian weaving and rungs and then did some weaving of our own:

We read so many awesome picture books but a memorable one was Tomie dePaola's Legend of the Indian Paintbrush. Afterward, the three of us drew Sunsets with a Native American village in the background.  They turned out really nice!

We also made Indian fry bread and it was a HUGE hit.  We definitely need to make it again.

It was frustrating to be so tired and have zero time for planning, but we still learned a ton together.  Next March we'll be able to delve into these topics further.

We hope Baby Israel will get easier next month so we all can sleep and feel better!

February 2023

February was a very interesting month. 

I started out very grumpy.  It was the end of my pregnancy and I felt uncomfortable, nervous and impatient.  We expected our sweet baby to come early, as his brother and sister had done (both were born at 38 weeks) but he didn't come!  So then it was a matter of trying to make things fun for the kids (who would soon be home bound with a new baby) without making big commitments that we wouldn't be able to keep.  

Early in the month we made rock candy for a science program that Atticus decided he wanted to participate in.  The boys both earned geology patches and we began working on the next patch for animal convervation. 

 

 

We did a project over at the Home Depot.  It was supposed to be a set of small glass vases but the boys decided they were chemistry beakers and started "sciencing" with them for the next couple of days.  Unfortunately, my grumpiness really got in the way and put an end to it pretty quickly. 

Of course, two weeks in we got to celebrate Valentine's Day.  As much as I was hoping our baby would be here by then it was nice to be able to focus on the kids in a special way one more time before life would get crazy.  Before the holiday we celebrated with some homeschool friends with a "love bug" theme.  

Then, on the big day itself I put up my valentines for the kiddos on their doors

Sweet Atticus surprised us by putting some hearts on our door.  His sweet messages melted my heart.

And the boys made valentines for each other, Lucy and for their grandparents.  

We had crepes for breakfast, heart shaped sandwiches for lunch, heart shaped pizza and martinelli's for our candle lit dinner and all sorts of special chocolates for dessert.  It was a fun day, even with my grouchiness.  

Atticus was almost as impatient as I was for our baby to come.  There was one night when I had some contractions and Atticus, unaware of what was happening said, "I think Israel is going to come tonight!"  In the morning he was so disappointed and I felt the same.  

It wasn't just that he wanted a day off of school, although I'm sure that was a huge reason.  He was also concerned about me and the baby.  One evening as he said our family prayer he was was so earnest as he asked, "Please help Mom."

Now that the baby is here he is very helpful.  There are still moments when he seems to forget he has three siblings and can get impatient/demanding.  But then there are days where he asks to hold Israel, where he plays with Lucy and tosses her on the bed or does all kinds of stunts with her in the sensory swings.  I am so proud of the big brother he has become.

We are also so proud of him a big milestone he passed in piano.  A few months ago the primary pianist (she plays while the children sing at church) challenged him to learn to play "I am a Child of God."  "If you learn to play it you can accompany the kids at church," she told him.  Well, it took him some time and there were plenty of tears along the way but he got so he had it practically memorized.

Two days before our Israel would come, he was ready.  He brought his simplified hymn book and started playing.  His introduction was flawless but when the kids started singing along, he had some trouble.  The first two verses were rough.  I was so worried, knowing of the rage he would fly into if he were at home with me.  To my great relief, he pushed through!  The third verse was flawless and you could see how proud he was of himself afterward.  I have a video of that last verse on Facebook if  you'd like to see it.

I am so proud of him for pushing through.  It is NOT something he naturally chooses to do and so we will be reminding him of this experience in the future.

Atticusism:

• "Hinckley, you always spend your money so recklessly.  When you get to be my age..."

Hinckley

Oh, Hinckley.  This was a harder month for our 5-year-old.  There were a few days in a row where he kept making unreasonable demands of me.  Even if I wasn't 39 weeks pregnant, his requests felt would have made me laugh but feeling as tired and uncomfortable as I did, they felt downright impossible.  For example, one day he asked for poached eggs for lunch.  I told him no and he said he would go to his room.  "If I'm not having poached eggs, I'm not eating," he threatened.  And thus it was.  He didn't end up eating anything until 4 PM.  

Another day he needed a new duct tape wallet- right then.  Eventually I got to it and he liked the product but it was the demand for immediate results that just made the day so hard.  

Thank heavens, he has become much easier now that the baby is here.  He has been his helpful, cheerful self much more of the time.

It should also be noted that he wrote his first chapter book this month.  It is called Cool Batman and has nine chapters in it.  It is hilarious- the story makes me laugh so hard.  Basically, Batman was about to take the Joker to his batcave when a rock slide blocks off the entrance to his cave.  His parents showed him a different entrance when he was 3 so he sets off to get in using that other entrance.  The journey takes him many days, during which time he an older rabbit and a lion join him.  He uses glue and leaves to make a sleeping bag, they scare off wolves more than once, there are "human skeletons" and monsters that block their way in one chapter, and at the end, when they feel really tired, Batman gives the two animals bowls of caffeine so they can run and run.  Oh, and Batman carries a "satchel" with him that has hamburgers, cake, ice cream and other food so that they always have dinner before going to bed.

It's not just the interesting story he came up with (by the way, I can see bits and pieces from many different stories we've been reading in it) but it's also the word choice that are remarkable.  He surprised his grandparents recently with some of the phrases he has used in conversation, some of which you can see in his quotes.

 

Hinckley speaks:

• "I like myself." (when he first got his school pictures- we didn't get them until January!)
• "I'm sciencing."
• "When Israel comes I'll be better." (about cleaning up after himself.)
• "Mom, you know why I want Israel to come out of your tummy tonight?  So you don't feel that pain anymore."
• "Yes, it's kind of complicated." (When asked if he liked having a baby brother.)
• "Mom, why does Israel smell so good?" ("Because he's a newborn.  That's how they smell!") "I wish I smelled like that."
• "It's fun having Dad at home (now that Israel is here) but it can be challenging."
• "No thanks.  I want to play with Israel."
• "Can I hold Israel?"

Lucy finally seemed to understand that a baby was coming this last month.  She would point at my tummy and say, "Baby coming?"  She also probably understood better because we had taken all of our baby toys/swings, etc. out of storage.

She LOVES the mail a little too much.  She loves to go and get it with me but then becomes very possessive of whatever we bring home.  This can upset Hinckley, who also loves the mail a great deal.  It's definitely become a balancing act of letting her hold on to the junk mail for the rest of the evening while being sure the important items don't get lost.

Listen to Lucy:

• "No!  That mine!"
• "Jesus loves you!"
• "Bebe's a-comin?"
• "I cahn't do this." (All words with the short a sound come out as "ah")
• "Fire is bye bye?" (after a neighbor had fireworks that woke her up and kept her up all night, she was worried about more fireworks for days.)
• "Hey!" (Said in the most angry way if you take anything she sees as hers... which is just about anything.)
• "Hold it." (For Israel- thankfully, she has begun saying, "Hold 'im.")
• "Poopy diaper!"
• "Diarrhea!" (Both of these unsavory phrases have been taught by older siblings who then laugh their heads off when she yells them.  Hooray.)

Homeschool has been spottier this month, especially with the baby's arrival.  Don't get me wrong, the boys are so motivated and still get their basics done every day but our work and study of the broader themes has definitely taken a dive.  We read the last two Rush Revere books and The Cricket in Times Square, and tried falafel and learned about Jewish holidays for our light study of the Holy Land.  

As much as I would have loved to study more from our monthly topics, we'll do more next year and my goodness, has this month been one of learning.  We've all had lessons in patience and delayed gratification, how to take care of a baby and the kids are all learning how to do more things on their own.  

As I was contemplating having another child while homeschooling a year or so ago, I took comfort from the testimonials of many other moms.  Their mantra was, "The baby is the lesson."  I couldn't agree more.  Learning compassion and how to enjoy the wonder of life have been pretty amazing themes.

Introducing Israel Ernest Maes

Israel Ernest Maes, born February 21, 2023 at 1:55 AM (his due date!) 6 lbs 13 oz, 20.5 inches long.

38 Weeks

39 weeks

Oh, how we love our handsome, punctual Baby Israel!