Sat. Dec. 7
The future is still uncertain. As of now, he is still on a feeding tube (it goes through his nose and he hates it- he has had to wear a sock on his left hand to keep him from pulling it out!) he has an IV still, he has to have his heart rate, breathing rate, and oxygen intake monitored constantly (and yesterday he went on oxygen because he just wasn't consistently breathing quite enough).
And to top it off, yesterday I arrived to see him with a light over him for jaundice. I just started to cry when they told me he had had a tough night. He just looks so tired- almost like an old man, and I just want to take all this pain from him- I'll go through it so he doesn't have to. But I can't.
Still, I know the Lord is looking out for our son. Last night, as I was feeling so low about Atticus, I just happened to be reading 3 Nephi 17 about the Savior when he blesses little children, weeps for them, and then angels come and minister to the little ones and encircle them with fire. I felt that this was Heavenly Father's way of reminding me of how very much he loves Atticus (and me, and all His children!) He will look out for our little man.
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